Official WI

Zero Pounds lost this week. It's better than 0.5lbs gained that I saw yesterday, but I agree....still not good. I'm trying not to worry about the scale too much. If I do I have days like yesterday (which ended with me having a damn pizza and NOT running). I hate that the scale still has that hold on me. I really thought I was over that, but I guess I'm not. Instead I let it determine my mood which resulted in me making bad choices....AGAIN. Gurrrrr.

Today I wasn't feeling that well.  I was still super tired so I went home early from work. I climbed into bed at 5:30pm and watched TV online for a bit via CastTV.com (LOVE ONLINE TV!). I watched some American Idol, Bones and then finally watched an episode of The biggest Loser. I'm not sure if you caught it, but one of the contestants ran their first 5K in the gym on the lastest episode. Actually he ran 5 Miles! That's 8K people and he's 375lbs! 

Of course this inspired me immediately. I got my fat ass out of bed, put my sweats on, and out the door I was to do week 3 run 3 of the c25k at 8:30pm. All I kept thinking was, if he can do it, I can too dammit! Tonights run was great. I felt like I could run longer than 3 minutes at a time, which is encouraging considering how I felt last time.  I'm not as scared anymore of week 4. I know it's going to be hard, but you guys are right...I need to try. I can do it. After all, if a 375lb man can do it. So can I! 

Tonight I also contacted my friend who is going to do my first 5K with me. He has finally picked our run. To my surprise he picked one in June! June 12th to be exact.  My first reaction was, "are you crazy? I can't do one in June. It's too soon"....but then I thought, that attitude is going to get me no where, so I agreed. AHHHHHHHH. So help me god.....

I guess  I have to remind myself that Operation give a Sh*T is not about finishing a 5K or getting to a goal weight (although yes, I do want to get there) ultimately for me, it's about getting healthy.  So even if I run half of this 5K and walk the rest, I am still accomplishing great things. It isn't a failure if I can't do the entire 5K right off the bat.....but let me tell ya I'm sure the hell going to try! 

I think it is good that I finally have a date to work towards. I need that more than ever right now, so I must say thank you to Michael from the biggest loser for the inspiration he gave me today. You'll never know how much I needed it.