Flakie Sadness

I had a weak moment and now I'm paying for it. When out grocery shopping yesterday I bought a lot of good foods. I also bought passion flakies and cinnamon raisin rice pudding. I knew it was bad, but I thought maybe (just maybe) I'd be able to not inhale them both in one day.


I was wrong.

I ate the entire box of flakies in less than 24 hour and the entire large container of rice pudding.

They are both completely gone now.

So. Not. Cool!

I'm not sure what triggered the need to inhale. I really didn't think it would turn out this way. I can have chocolate in my house and ice cream in my house for weeks without eating it now (something I would have inhaled before), but I suppose flakies and rice pudding are still a red flag food for me. It's better if I just stay away.

I was feeling a bit nervous/anxious after I wrote my post last night (okay, well perhaps I do know why I inhaled) After looking up my route on mapmyrun like I said I did, I then went to coolrunning.com and realized I'm only running 3K in 25 minutes when I should be running 4K. I knew I was slow, but it was kind of like a punch to the stomach. Here I thought I was doing well (and yes, I do realize I still am for just doing it in the first place), but then to realize I'm behind the pace by so much...well, it kind of sucks. Top it off with the fact I mapped out 5K and now truly know how far that is....I think I freaked out a bit.

Today I'm feeling a bit better of course. I'm trying not to think of the 5K race, but just taking it run by run as I have for the last 7 weeks. On the coolrunning website It states "Week 7 - Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then jog 2.5 miles (or 25 minutes)." My podcast just has me running 25 minutes...but perhaps I need to run the 2.5 miles (4km) instead no matter how long it takes me. I'm really not sure. Four kilometers might take me 35 minutes and that's a huge jump from running for only 25 minutes. Ahhhh...I'm not sure what to do. Help! Any runners out there?

Damn Scale

Feeling sluggish today. Ugh... I really didn't want to get out of bed this morning. This is the first time I've felt this way in a long time.

I also stepped on the scale one day early for my WI this morning, and I totally shouldn't have. Why? Because I was up! Gurrrr. Only 0.5lbs, but still. WTF? I hate the damn scale. It just seems to go against all the great changes I have made. It takes those changes and squashes them like a bug.  

I do know my sodium was high and a few foods I wasn't sure how to track, but still...you'd think I would lose something. Hell, I'd be happy with anything in the DOWN direction. I hate that even when you eat healthy, you still gain weight. A part of me would rather gain weight eating the big macs I use to if this is the results I'm going to get. Now I wouldn't, considering I love betsy too much, but still.

Of course this set me off to self sabatage. I went and drove through McD's for breakfast and had a egg mcmuffin minus the canadian bacon. A good choice? Of course not, but perhaps I still haven't got a hold of my "who gives a shit, what I'm doing isn't working anyway" feelings. I also had a falafal for lunch. ugh...I know. Not good either.

I did make one good choice though today. I got out for a walk on my lunch break for 30 minutes. It wasn't long, but it was something I suppose. It's more than what I would have done in the past - especially on days when I am tired. Usually I'd just vegetate in the staff lounge.

Thanks for the feedback on the c25k. I think I will attempt week 4 when it comes and see how I do. I still have one more run of week three to get through though and I'm hoping to do it tonight.  Right now I'm pretty tired though, so fingers crossed I can push myself when I get home tonight.